3 down and 1 to go

On the 13th I went in for my 3rd lumbar puncture (LP) to check for leukemia cells and to also inject chemo.  This one came back clean - no blasts!  The docs want me to have 4 clean LPs to show that the cancer in the spinal fluid is in remission.  The next LP is scheduled for Monday the 20th.

I have had a lot of people asking me how long I get to stay home and what the plan is from here.  I don't have all the answers since we just go from one biopsy to the next.  Here is the plan as far as we know it.  I get to stay home while my numbers recover as long as I don't get sick.  Any sign of a fever or chills or numerous other symptoms and I am back in the hospital.  Once my bone marrow begins to make blood again we will schedule another biopsy.  This should be within about 2 weeks but no one can predict it.  Once the results from the biopsy are in then we will form another plan of action.  We are praying for remission (no blasts in the marrow) so that I can move directly to transplant. If we have not achieved remission there are other options to get me to transplant but we are just taking one step at a time.

I am thoroughly enjoying being at home and just listening to our girls laugh, giggle and occasionally argue.  It is nice to be in my own bed or recliner and eating my own food.  I am grateful for all of your prayers that have gotten me to this point.  Prayers are being answered as evidenced in the strength of my body to endure the chemo.  Thank you.

Just to make sure you all don't think I am invincible, I do have moments where it is all overwhelming.  One of those moments happened this week where I was just mad that I didn't have my old life, I can't drive myself places, and everything I eat tastes like cardboard.  Thankfully these moments pass and I am grateful to my mom and to a nurse, Liz, who were there for me.  I wish I could schedule these moments at my convenience but they have their own schedule.  Liz just whispered to me that I was okay right where I was at.  That being angry is normal and that I am just in the middle of this fight.  My mom hugged me and wiped away my tears and just rubbed my arm.  I am grateful to have such amazing people in my life and to remember that it is okay to be mad!

While I am at home I do go to McKay Dee hospital each morning to have my blood drawn to check the numbers and to receive platelets or red blood cells if needed.  It is a small price to pay - an hour or two - in order to be at home.  Today we did see a small spike in my numbers indicating that my bone marrow may be producing a little bit.  Tomorrow we will see if that was a fluke or if it really is back.


Also, my dear friend Heather Carlson began a page for us at posthope.org if you would like to follow there.  Thanks Heather!!!!